What Makes A True Mentor?
By Pilar Kuhn
We often hear folks in our community lament that we don’t have mentorship like we used to, but I wonder if that’s more reflective of the mentality of dog people today? Do we, the younger generation of fanciers, really take the time to listen and learn from those who have been at this longer? Those established breeders and exhibitors have taken chances. They’ve made mistakes. They’ve had successes. It’s one thing to breed a litter of puppies. It’s another thing to breed litter after litter with focus and direction and an understanding of how to preserve a breed based on the standard as well as knowing what’s behind pedigrees and the people that made those breeding choices so many years ago.
Through conversations with various dog enthusiasts over the past several years, I have heard consistently that exhibitors and breeders today do not fully understand what mentors or mentorship means. One conversation does not constitute having a mentor. But the phrase, “Find yourself a good mentor,” comes up all the time. So what makes a true mentor?
A few months ago, I had the opportunity to travel east to my husband’s Scottie mentor’s house. Breeding and showing Scotties for over 30 years, this family took my husband under their wings many, many years ago, sold him his first “show” Scottie, and shared their years of insight regarding future breedings for his own breeding program. Because of their long-time relationship and positive influence on his involvement with showing and breeding dogs, I viewed this trip as a boon to my own relationship with my husband in our breeding program.
Sundays at their house and kennel are usually set aside for grooming dogs. I think my heart skipped a beat when they wanted to make sure that would be amenable to me. Spending a day grooming on Scotties under their guidance as well as learning more about my second breed would be close to heaven for me. I also prefer to lend a pair of helping hands when I am a guest in someone’s facility rather than being a nuisance hanging around with nothing to do.
So I took a plunge and stripped and trimmed a Scottie from start to finish. While I took hours under guided tutelage for one dog, I noticed dog after dog hopped on a table, got groomed, and went back to their respective run. By the end of the day, my hands were sore. I had blisters. And I just hoped I had done an OK job on the one dog trusted to me.
While grooming, we spent hours talking about dogs, structure, form, various lines, breeders, pedigrees, and I soaked it all in from morning to night. I valued the chance to put my hands on many, many Scotties of different ages. I watched various grooming techniques on different coat types. I also got a tour of a boarding facility and grooming shop. It was evident that the love and care of dogs meant the world to this family. I left feeling much wiser and thoroughly enriched.
I had one last stop to make before heading to the airport. My husband’s first show Scottie was buried in a grave at their home. It was an honor to see the final resting place of the boy dog that meant so much to my husband and exists in past generations of our current Scotties. It also meant a lot to my husband that I took the time to pay homage. My short stint on the east coast gave me so much insight and further knowledge. I’m thankful I had the chance to immerse myself in my other breed for a few days. I’m thankful these same mentors have spent the last fifteen years mentoring my husband.
I decided to question my social media channels and ask those in my network what makes a good mentor. Here are some of the responses. According to them, a good mentor has the following qualities:
- Experience and has paid their dues
- Knows winning doesn’t mean everything
- Honesty
- Integrity
- Demonstrates good sportsmanship
Another general consensus? A good mentor is available for questions, ideas, suggestions, and is never afraid to let their protégés soar. I definitely soared home after my rewarding trip. I valued the time with my husband’s mentors and I consider them my mentors as well. I hope everyone out there has had, or will find, a great mentor. It’s never too late to learn something new.
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