Say Something (Anything) Nice
206 – April 2019
By Kat Smith
From the archives of The Canine Chronicle
A few years ago, I went out to dinner with a group of breeders I did not know well. I love talking with people from other breeds: sharing thoughts on type, whelping tips, or the excitement of their young special. Unfortunately, that night’s dinner conversation revolved around petty vendettas, passive aggressive Facebook posts, and unkind comments about people and their pets.
I cashed out early and on my way to the hotel thought about the five-year shelf life of new exhibitors. I’ m confident that pervasive negativity is one reason for it. It’s the riptide that pulls you in and keeps you down, and people’s only escape seems to be out of the sport altogether. Not only that, but it also reinforces our snobby stereotype to the HSUS-influenced public, depresses our dogs – and honestly, did we forget we do this for fun?
I’m not the only one who sees it – signs reading “Be Positive or Be Quiet” have popped up here in New England. They get it: if you’re going to spend 10 hours standing on concrete, it’s more fun to spend it with cheerleaders than naysayers.
If it’s been awhile and you’ve forgotten, it actually feels really nice to be kind. And being miserable drains the life out of you. Rather than complain that other people need to stop being negative (oh, the irony), step up and lead the way toward a more positive environment.
You can start by making room for the frazzled person who showed up too late to get a grooming spot; you’ve been there before, you know. Offer kind but honest suggestions to those who earnestly ask or look like they need it. Shake off your dog’s (or your judge’s) bad day; congratulate the person who beat you, and don’t undo it later on social media. Above all, be hopelessly polite, even and especially when others are not.
In addition to spreading positivity, don’t make room for negativity. Just listening to someone complain releases stress hormones into your bloodstream!
Sometimes, I interrupt rants to ask people point blank: If you hate dog shows so much, why do you do it? They backpedal and say they don’t really hate it, then the conversation pivots toward the good things that have kept them there.
From the archives of The Canine Chronicle
Click here to read the complete article206 – April 2019
Short URL: http://caninechronicle.com/?p=161184
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