Looking Back with Lee
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“My Friend, Silver”
By Lee Canalizo
This is not what I had in mind to think about this month, but sometimes you really have to go with your heart! I wrote the most of following soon after the loss of my eleven year-old German Shepherd Dog, “Silver”. I added to it and wanted to share my thoughts with you.
Usually, I’m a happy, optimistic person, but I’m having a tough time keeping the tears at bay from one moment to the next. On Sunday, May 24, I had to say a final goodbye to my wonderful German Shepherd Dog, Silver. I’ve had many, many, wonderful, special dogs over my lifetime, but Silver was the most special of all in so many ways. He came into my life three weeks after my husband Jim died. Jimmy Moses brought him to me as a three-month-old puppy with huge feet, big floppy ears, very sharp teeth and a huge heart full of love! In no time at all, we were best friends and constant companions. He was better by far than many people that I have crossed in my life!
I don’t want to sound so depressing but I think so many of us suffer these overwhelming feelings of grief and depression when we lose our best friends. I also don’t think that these debilitating feelings are generally recognized by those around us, except for a very few! My family, all doggie, has been so good, as they DO understand, but I know that’s not the general rule. This article addresses those who have gone thru this pain.
I want to tell you all something that is sensitive to talk about but may be of help to some of you in the future. Surely we all let our special ones get away with too much…and just as assured there will be habits and traits that they develop. Silver did not like the car and would get agitated after riding for a bit. Toward the end he required frequent vet visits and I could tell it was affecting him with each successive trip. When it was inevitable that his time was coming to an end, I did not want to add to his burden, nor could I fathom the thought of him being stressed any more. His body already was unable to physically provide for him the dignity he always evoked. I researched and found, with my children’s help, a vet that would come to the home and quietly and peacefully, with his loved ones with him…or in my case, holding him, let him go without any undue trauma. It WAS easy for my boy, not so for me, but that was not what it was about! It was also one of the most difficult things I ever had to do and I still find myself second guessing my decision. No! I really know it was time and so did my boy, as I could see it in his eyes!
My house and my heart are empty now but I hope that soon I can have some of the joy return in the form of a big, beautiful German Shepherd boy with whom to share my life.
Fast forward to today!
My home is alive again with “Luke,” another German Shepherd Dog also secured for me via my “ Shepherd Family” with Jimmy, Sheree and Kent (along with a host of others that rallied around the call) taking time to find me the right guy to fill Silver’s spot on the couch.
This time things were a bit different. First, in my mind I thought I could take on another wild and crazy puppy…but then reality set in. Eleven years ago it was doable…barely. Now, I had to call a spade a spade and admit that one may have to embrace their years and look for a pal that might be past the puppy stage(s). Well, ones misfortune is sometimes the path to something better. Word came to me of a long-time breeder who was facing some personal health problems and was faced with having to let some of her dogs find another to love them. Even after fifty years of breeding and placing dogs, I can’t imagine having to be in that situation unexpectedly.
I trusted my guys to find me a new buddy, and they did! Luke made his way to Tampa in June where I picked him up. He is different enough that Silver’s individuality will never be replaced, and he’s special enough that he’s making his own mark on my soul. We have been figuring each other out day by day. I don’t know all that he’s been through, and I think there might have been some things made him nervous, but I was at a loss to know exactly what they could have been. He always stays close to me, and sleeps facing the door to watch for anything that shouldn’t be expected. He eats everything in sight! We have moved on from being too thin to, “Luke, not me! He’s started to stake out which toys he likes best, and he enjoys bath time when one of my sons comes to give him a “spa day”.
So I guess what I want to share is how our lives with dogs mature as we do. I raised the young ones (children and dogs) and had some exciting times that made me prouder, than proud. But when the limelight started to fade, I was able to find a special situation where a dog needed a home as much as I needed to home one. And now there is a new and brighter light within me.
Thanks for reading my story. I promise a typical upbeat “Looking Back with Lee” next month!
Short URL: http://caninechronicle.com/?p=90670
Posted by ralbee
on Oct 18 2015. Filed under Current Articles, Editorial, Featured.
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